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Heating things up – a guide to temperature play with sex toys

If you’re looking for new ways to heat up things in the bedroom or maybe even cool it down a few notches, why not try temperature play? Ever heard of it? Whether you want to spice up your sex life or add an extra element to a solo session, using ice, hot wax, or your newest toys can certainly help reignite that flame, or add a little more excitement to those intimate moments in a safe, easy, and fun manor! In this article we look at how you can introduce temperature play into the bedroom.


What is Temperature Play? 

Temperature play is described by LoveHoney’s Love and Sex expert Shamyra Howard as

An erotic form of consensual sensation play that's often carried out by people who engage in BDSM play or kink. The goal of temperature play is to use the elements of heat and cold to heighten the senses.” 

To put it simply, it is the act of using different temperatures to stimulate a person’s body and heighten sensations. Although it is usually seen as part of BDSM, specifically it’s a type of sensation play, it can also be used as part of foreplay or during masturbation. The aim of temperature play is to provoke arousal by encouraging the body to be more sensitive from different temperatures, such as using ice or cold water over the body or increasing the temperature by using warm water and even candles and hot wax. 

Although you can choose to use only one temperature (such as focusing on using colder temperatures when it is a hot summer day), to encourage the best reaction and heighten sensations, it is highly recommended that you use a combination of temperatures. You could even blindfold your partner to build anticipation, and make them more sensitive to the changes. 


Why should I try it? 

Playing with temperature heightens sensations that stimulate the bodies neuro receptors in unpredictable ways, when done during sex this stimulation can add to arousal and build anticipation, especially if done to a person wearing a blindfold!

Whether done as part of foreplay, sex or when masturbating the great thing with playing with temperature is that the heightened sensations Temperature play can create an added sensuality and intimacy to your foreplay, sex or masturbation, as you engage with yours and your partners bodies. The sensitivity you create allows you to have a deeper understanding and connection to yours and your partners bodies that you might otherwise miss during sex.

How can I get started? 

There are several different ways you can try temperature play, below are just three of the ways you can introduce temperature play in the bedroom:

To begin with, if you're worried about the sensations being too intense, why not build up to it slowly by performing oral after drinking warm or ice-cold water? To build up sensations and create unpredictable patterns you could alternate between the two. Ice cubes are the perfect DIY tools for at home temperature play and can be used in numerous ways to heighten sensations and create a sensual and intimate environment either both solo and with a partner. 

To begin with, during foreplay you can always run the ice cubes over your body, paying close attention to the nipples, lips, neck, and labia lips. The cold will cause the body to tense and arousal to heighten in anticipation of what is to come. 

If you’re with a partner, why not try putting the ice cube in your mouth as you kiss them or give oral, the cold melting into the warmth of your mouth will create an unpredictable dual sensations that will drive your partner wild. 

A great way to turn up the heat in the bedroom is through wax play, try having your partner lay on their back (under a towel to save you having to clean up the sheets after) as you pour wax on their nipples, chest or even legs. To make sure that wax play is done safely you can buy specific temperature play wax drip candles that will leave your partner feeling warm and sensitive without worrying about burning them by accident. 

If candles seem a little bit too intense for you currently, a great way to up the heat in a sexy way is through a massage. By using warming massage oils, you can dial up the intimacy as you learn your partner’s body. The warmth will help them relax and build up their pleasure, leaving them ready for your next move. 

A great way to introduce sex toys into your temperature play can be by using lube. Try putting your lube in the fridge to make it extra cold or warm it up in a bowl of warm water (not too hot as you don’t want to scald yourself or the person you’re using it on!) to create a nice warming effect. 

Alternatively, certain brands have created warming or cooling lubes that create a tingling sensation when used, the aim of these is to heighten sensitivity on the nerves in the penis or vulva creating a more intense feeling when oral or penetration is performed.   

Can I use sex toys during temperature play? 

Yes, you can use sex toys when playing with temperature, in fact it is highly encouraged and can be done in several ways. You can use a sex toy alongside creating sensations elsewhere on the person’s body.  Alternatively, if you have the correct materials, such as our 99% recycled aluminium toy, Maya.  you can also change the temperature of the sex toy itself to use on yourself or your partner. 

Maya is our first vibrator made entirely of recycled aluminium with no silicone. Because of the materials used and its disconnecting head, you can place it safely in warm water or a bowl of icy or cold water. The different temperatures, either on their own or used in tandem with each other, have the added effect of heightening sensations throughout the vulva making the vibrations that much more powerful. 

However, you should always remember that with added sensations this can sometimes be too much, so no matter how intense you make the temperatures, always remember to check in with your partner and to make sure that everyone involved in enjoying the sensations that are happening. Whether with a toy or just using ice or candles, temperature play is a sure-fire way to spice things up as you try something new, either by yourself or with your partner.

Written by Katrina Fairhurst 



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